By Areli Tenorio
Negative thoughts. Sometimes it seems like that’s all that fills my mind. They’re attached to me, and I can’t let go. It would be nice to talk to my brain and tell it to shut up when it’s bothering me. Honestly, sometimes controlling our thoughts can be challenging.
That night I was restless. My brain was playing its game again, trying to put me down. I was exhausted and fed up with life. I was so desperate. I struggled to find the light in that pool of darkness.
I wanted the healing, yet I recognized how broken I was. I was looking for the thread and the needle to be able to sew myself back together. Healing is a demanding process. At that time, I needed someone who would take the risk to give me the needle and the thread. Nevertheless, no one was there. Why? Friends don’t stay in dark times. They like the light.
I needed someone to rescue me.
That is when this surprising thought came to me/ A memory from when I was 5, “God is always here, yet you just forgot about him.” That thought was like a bomb in my head. It was true, and I had forgotten about it. I had someone.
You, LORD, keep my lamp burning; my God turns my darkness into light. With your help I can advance against an army; with my God, I can scale a wall. As for God, his way is perfect: The LORD’s word is flawless; he shields all who take refuge in him. (Psalms 18: 28,30)
MY LORD TURNS MY DARKNESS INTO LIGHT
Isn’t this amazing? I say I am weak, and He says you are strong. I say I’m ugly, and He says I made you beautiful. I say I’m not enough, and He says for me, you are. He says you are mine, and I love you. I can feel His Love.
That was it. The beginning of a new era. New opportunities. The latest purpose in life. New me. I’m not saying it’s easy now. Trust me; it’s not. But each day I choose to trust God's word instead of mine.